99 Memorable Kenny Powers Quotes “You Gotta Have Swagger”

  • Rainy Quote
  • May 09, 2023
Kenny Powers Quotes

As a huge fan of the HBO series Eastbound & Down, I can’t help but be enamored with the show’s main character, Kenny Powers. Played brilliantly by Danny McBride, Powers is a former Major League Baseball pitcher who is arrogant, foul-mouthed, and downright hilarious. But beyond his crude humor and antics, Kenny Powers is also a source of inspiration, with quotes that are both funny and insightful. In this article, I’ll share some of the best Kenny Powers quotes to inspire and entertain you.

The 25 Best Kenny Powers Quotes of All Time

1. “I play real sports, not trying to be the best at exercising” – Kenny Powers
2. “I’m not a role model…just because I dunk a basketball doesn’t mean I should raise your kids” – Kenny Powers
3. “You’re f***ing out!” – Kenny Powers
4. “You gotta learn to love yourself before you can love someone else” – Kenny Powers
5. “I’m like Evel Knievel, I get paid to do crazy sh*t” – Kenny Powers
6. “I’m not saying I’m gonna change the world, but I guarantee that I’ll spark the brain that will” – Kenny Powers
7. “I need you…to love me…while I’m loving me” – Kenny Powers
8. “I tell people I’m a bad person, but I don’t really believe that. I think I have a good heart, but the way it comes out sometimes is just f***ed up” – Kenny Powers
9. “I’m completely unqualified to teach or mentor anyone, but that’s not gonna stop me from trying” – Kenny Powers
10. “I’m not gonna stand here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America” – Kenny Powers
11. “I don’t need to be driven, I inspire myself” – Kenny Powers
12. “I’m the man with the ball, I’m the man who can throw it faster than f***” – Kenny Powers
13. “Sometimes when you bring the thunder, you get lost in the storm” – Kenny Powers
14. “When your ass went to sleep, your thoughts betrayed you” – Kenny Powers
15. “Life is too short to not take a chance on something, so if you think that something is worth it, then you gotta try” – Kenny Powers
16. “I’m the only one who’s allowed to make fun of the kid from The Sixth Sense” – Kenny Powers
17. “I’m not listening to you, you’re like the guy in the chair” – Kenny Powers
18. “I’m not afraid to throw the first punch, if necessary” – Kenny Powers
19. “I’m playing mind games, not wearing a noose” – Kenny Powers
20. “Sometimes, if you want to see change, you gotta make a little noise” – Kenny Powers
21. “I take sh*tloads of drugs, because I like to win” – Kenny Powers
22. “I’m like a superhero, but without the powers or motivation” – Kenny Powers
23. “The world is my toilet, I can sh*t anywhere” – Kenny Powers
24. “I’m sorry, I thought this was America” – Kenny Powers
25. “I’m on the verge of greatness, I’m this close” – Kenny Powers

Laugh Out Loud with These Hilarious Kenny Powers Quotes

Kenny Powers is without a doubt one of the funniest characters in TV history, thanks in part to Danny McBride’s impeccable comedic timing. Here are some of the best Kenny Powers quotes that will make you laugh out loud:

1. “I’m not trying to be the best at exercising, I play real sports”
2. “I’m gonna f***ing kill your family!”
3. “I’m not a scientist, I don’t know how gravity works”
4. “I’m the man with the ball, I’m the man who can throw it faster than f***”
5. “I’m not gonna wear a tool-belt, that’s f***ing baby sh*t”
6. “I’m gonna be honest with you, I’m kind of a big deal”
7. “I talk a lot of sh*t, I don’t give a f*** if it’s true or not”
8. “I’m a goddamn champion, I’ll take anything that comes my way”
9. “I’m a profound and sensitive guy, I just don’t like to share that side of myself with people”
10. “I don’t play by the rules, I make the rules”

Kenny Powers Quotes That Will Inspire You to Be a Champion

While Kenny Powers may not be the most admirable character, there are moments when his quotes can be truly inspiring. Here are some of the best Kenny Powers quotes that will motivate you to be a champion:

1. “You gotta learn to love yourself before you can love someone else”
2. “I’m not gonna quit until I’m a goddamn champion, that’s my promise to you”
3. “I’m not gonna let anyone tell me that I can’t do something”
4. “Sometimes, if you want to see change, you gotta make a little noise”
5. “Life’s too short not to take a chance on something, so if you think that something is worth it, then you gotta try”
6. “When you’re down, you can either give up or get up, and I choose to get up”
7. “I’m the one who’s in control of my destiny, nobody else”
8. “You gotta believe in yourself, even when nobody else does”
9. “Pain and failure is your friend, it’s your teacher. The greatest lesson life can teach you is to embrace the pain, and learn something from it”
10. “Success and greatness come from within, it’s up to you to unlock it and let it shine”

The Most Memorable Kenny Powers Quotes from Eastbound & Down

Kenny Powers has so many memorable quotes from the series, it’s hard to narrow them down. Here are some of the most memorable quotes from Eastbound & Down:

1. “I am the motherf***er that found this place. This is my goddamn house”
2. “I’m not trying to be a legend, I’m just trying to pay rent”
3. “I’m not deaf, I’m ignoring you”
4. “I’ll never quit, even if they tell me I have six months to live, unless it’s in the middle of a season, because that would be f***ing weak”
5. “I’m the man who has the ball, I’m the man who can throw it faster than f***”
6. “I’m not a loser, I’m a winner who happens to be losing right now”
7. “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you, my earballs were busy looking at a naked lady magazine”
8. “I’m the type of guy who can’t watch a movie without commenting on it”
9. “I’m not gonna let anyone tell me what to do, except for judges”
10. “Life’s a garden, dig it”

Kenny Powers Quotes That Prove He’s the Ultimate Antihero

Kenny Powers is the ultimate antihero, a character who may be flawed but still manages to be endearing and lovable. Here are some of the best Kenny Powers quotes that prove he’s the ultimate antihero:

1. “I’m not a role model…just because I dunk a basketball doesn’t mean I should raise your kids”
2. “I’m not a bad person, I just do bad things sometimes”
3. “I’m not listening to you, you’re like the guy in the chair”
4. “I don’t have time for your bullsh*t, but I am willing to listen to your lies”
5. “I’m a bad motherf***er, don’t you forget it”
6. “I’m the type of guy who doesn’t believe in guilty pleasures. If you like something, you should own it”
7. “I’m not here to be liked, I’m here to be respected”
8. “I’m not afraid to fail, I’m afraid to not try”
9. “I don’t need anyone’s approval, I have my own”
10. “I’m not perfect, but I’m perfect in my own way”

The Funniest Kenny Powers Quotes That Will Make Your Day

Kenny Powers is a comedic genius, and his quotes never fail to bring a smile to your face. Here are some of the funniest Kenny Powers quotes that will make your day:

1. “I’m like a bull in a china shop if the china shop was full of sh*t”
2. “I’m a grown-ass man, I do what I want”
3. “I’m not a big fan of horror movies, because my life is a horror movie”
4. “I don’t have an anxiety problem, I have an asshole problem”
5. “I’m not afraid of death, but I am afraid of clowns”
6. “I don’t need a safety net, I got f***ing wings”
7. “I’m the type of guy who shows up and starts drinking before anyone else”
8. “I’m not a philosopher unless you count me philosophizing on how to f***ing dominate”
9. “I’m not good with technology, I prefer to use my fists”
10. “I’m not a liar, I’m a truth-bender”

Kenny Powers Quotes That Sum Up Life as a Sports Fan

As a former professional athlete, Kenny Powers has much to say about sports. Here are some of the best Kenny Powers quotes that sum up life as a sports fan:

1. “I’m not a gambler, I’m a f***ing warrior”
2. “I’m not a fan of golf, it’s like watching a bunch of retarded animals chase a ball around a pasture”
3. “I don’t care about the moon landing, I wanna see Pete Rose slide headfirst into home plate”
4. “I’m not a big fan of rollerblading, I prefer to use my feet”
5. “I’m the type of guy who would rather be playing than watching”
6. “I’m not a fan of soccer, it’s like a bunch of people running around with a ball for no reason”
7. “I’m not gonna sit here and tell you that losing is fun, but sometimes it’s necessary”
8. “I’m not a fan of getting hit by a baseball, but I’m even less of a fan of missing one”
9. “I don’t need a coach, I coach myself”
10. “I’m not gonna stop until I’m the greatest of all time, and even then, I’m still gonna keep going”

The Most Iconic Kenny Powers Quotes That You Need to Know

Kenny Powers has become a cultural icon, and his quotes have become legendary. Here are the most iconic Kenny Powers quotes that you need to know:

1. “You’re f***ing out!”
2. “Sometimes when you bring the thunder, you get lost in the storm”
3. “I’m the man with the ball, I’m the man who can throw it faster than f***”
4. “I’m not trying to be the best at exercising, I play real sports”
5. “I’m on the verge of greatness, I’m this close”
6. “I’m the one who’s in control of my destiny, nobody else”
7. “I’m sorry, I thought this was America”
8. “I play by my own rules, nobody else’s”
9. “I’m the type of guy who gives 110%, even if it’s just 10% of the time”
10. “I’m like a chupacabra, I’ll suck the life out of you”

Kenny Powers Quotes That Will Make You Want to Binge-Watch Eastbound & Down

If you haven’t already binged-watched Eastbound & Down, these Kenny Powers quotes will make you want to start right away:

1. “I’m not gonna quit until I’m a goddamn champion”
2. “I’m like Evel Knievel, I get paid to do crazy sh*t”
3. “I’m not a role model, I’m a cautionary tale”
4. “I’m the champion of the f***ing world, and nothing can bring me down”
5. “I’m not afraid of hard work, I’m afraid of not working hard enough”
6. “I don’t have hobbies, I have passions”
7. “I’m the king of the world, and all you motherf***ers are just living in it”
8. “I’m not gonna stop until I have what I want, and what I want is everything”
9. “I’m not here to be liked, I’m here to win”
10. “I’m not just the hero this city deserves, I’m the hero it needs”

The Best Kenny Powers Quotes That Will Keep You Motivated

If you’re looking for some motivation, these Kenny Powers quotes will do just that:

1. “You gotta learn to love yourself before you can love someone else”
2. “Life’s too short to not take a chance on something, so if you think that something is worth it, then you gotta try”
3. “Success and greatness comes from within, it’s up to you to unlock it and let it shine”
4. “When you’re down, you can either give up or get up, and I choose to get up”
5. “I’m not gonna let anyone tell me that I can’t do something”
6. “You gotta believe in yourself, even when nobody else does”
7. “Pain and failure is your friend, it’s your teacher. The greatest lesson life can teach you is to embrace the pain, and learn something from it”
8. “I’m the only one who can hold myself back, and I’m not gonna do that anymore”
9. “I’m not afraid to fail, I’m afraid to not try”
10. “Life is a journey, and you gotta enjoy the ride”

In Conclusion

Kenny Powers may be crude and vulgar at times, but his quotes are also funny, insightful, and inspiring. Whether you’re a fan of Eastbound & Down or not, these quotes prove that Kenny Powers is one of the most memorable characters in TV history. So, if you’re ever feeling down or need a little motivation, just remember what Kenny Powers would say: “Life is too short not to take a chance on something, so if you think that something is worth it, then you gotta try.”

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Hi, I'm a writer and blogger with a degree in psychology. I love sharing my thoughts and experiences through writing and have contributed to various online publications. In my free time, you can find me outdoors, reading, or spending time with loved ones. Thank you for visiting my blog!

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