Looking for some hilarious Bob Saget quotes? You’ve come to the right place!
Bob Saget is best known for his role as Danny Tanner on the beloved ’90s sitcom Full House. But did you know that he’s also a stand-up comedian with a knack for delivering some seriously funny one-liners?
Here at RainyQuote.com, we’ve rounded up some of our favorite Bob Saget quotes. So whether you’re in need of a good laugh or some sage wisdom, be sure to check out our list!
Short Overview About Bob Saget
There’s no denying that Bob Saget is one of the most entertaining and successful comedians in the last several years.
He’s been making us laugh for decades, whether it’s through his stand-up comedy, his iconic role on the hit sitcom Full House, or more recently, his hosting gig on America’s Funniest Home Videos.
But what makes Saget so funny? Is it his observational humor? His self-deprecating jokes? His impeccable timing?
It’s probably all of those things and more. But one thing’s for sure: Bob Saget is hilarious, and we can all learn a thing or two from his comedic genius.
Unfortunately, Bob Saged passed away on January 9, 2022, at 65, but his career, personality, and kindness are very admirable
These are some bob saged quotes that may inspire you:
1. “I’m not the guy from ‘Full House.’ I’m the guy from ‘Full House’ who tells you the guy from ‘Full House’ is the guy from ‘Full House.'”
2. “I’m not going to say I’m the best father in the world, but I’m a pretty good father.”
3. “I’m not trying to be the funniest person in the room. I’m just trying to be the most real.”
4. “I’m very grateful for what I have, but I also know that luck is only a small part of it.”
5. “I think the best advice I can give to anybody is to just be yourself and know that it’s good enough.”
6. “I’m not perfect, but I’m perfectly myself.”
7. “I’m comfortable in my own skin, and I hope that rubs off on other people.”
8. “I’m not looking to be liked by everybody. I’m just looking to be liked by those who matter.”
9. “I’m not here to make you laugh. I’m here to make you think.”
10. “I’m not here to be your friend. I’m here to be your guide.”
11. “I’m not supposed to say ‘Dumbass.’ It’s not in my contract.”
12. “I think failure is nothing more than life’s way of nudging you that you need to change course.”
13. “Remember, if you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to be a horrible warning.”
14. “You know the Jewish guilt I was raised with? Now I have Catholic guilt. I can’t win.”
15. “I still have dreams of being asked to the prom. I just don’t want it to be by a 400-pound woman.”
16. “I’m very Gravelly voiced, which is ironic because I am not.”
10. “I’m doing a lot of charity work these days because I need the karma. I did some pretty horrible things when I was a kid.”
11. “I’m not an alcoholic, but I drink like one. I like to wake up in the morning and have a beer. I like to have a beer with lunch. I like to have a beer with dinner. Then I like to have a couple of beers before bed.”
12. “I’m trying to get in touch with my feminine side. I bought a Camry.”
13. “I’m not good with advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”
14. “I’m the only person in the world who can say ‘PMS’ and have people laugh.”
15. “I’m the guy who puts the ‘ha’ in ‘has-been.'”
16. “I’m the only person in the world who can say ‘I’m not gay, but I’ll sleep with you for money and people will still laugh.”
17. “I’m not saying that I don’t make mistakes, but I’m not saying that I do. I’m not saying anything.”
18. “I’m sorry, I just realized I left my life in your hands.”
Bob Saget Quotes About Life
It is difficult to overestimate the impact that Bob Saget has had on American culture and lifestyle.
As the star of two of the most popular sitcoms of all time – Full House and America’s Funniest Home Videos – he has been a mainstay of American television for over two decades.
In recent years, he has reinvented himself as a stand-up comedian, and his observations about life, love, and parenthood have resonated with a whole new generation of fans.
Here are the best Bob Saget quotes about life:
19. “The thing I realized is that life is short. You have to live in the present and not take things for granted.”
20. “You can’t keep living in your comfort zone. You have to get out there and take some risks.”
21. “A sense of humor is important. I think it’s what keeps us human.”
22. “I’m a firm believer that the more you live, the more you learn.”
23. “You have to laugh at yourself. It’s one of the things that keep you sane.”
24. “I think one of the most important things in life is to find something that you’re passionate about.”
25. “I’m a big believer in following your dreams.”
26. “You should never give up on your dreams.”
27. “If you don’t have a sense of humor, life is going to be tough.”
28. “I think the most important thing in life is to be happy.”
29. “You’re only as good as the company you keep.”
30. “The best way to find out who your real friends are is to get into a major car accident.”
40. “Live every day like it’s your last because one day it will be.”
41. “Don’t take life too seriously – you’ll never get out alive.”
42. “Laughter is the best medicine.”
43. “You can’t keep everyone happy all the time – you’re not a jar of Nutella.”
45. “The best things in life are free – except for relationships, those will cost you.”
46. “I’m not saying life is easy, but it’s a lot easier if you’re not an idiot.”
47. “The best way to avoid getting old is to die young – but sadly, that’s not always an option.”
48. “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
49. “You can’t control everything – sometimes you just have to relax and go with the flow.”
50. “People are like horses – you can lead them to water, but you can’t make them drink.”
51. “Treat others the way you want to be treated.”
52. “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”
53. “Give 110% – unless you’re giving blood, then just give 100%.”
54. “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”
55. “Life is too short to waste time on things that don’t matter.”
56. “You can’t change the past, but you can learn from it.”
57. “The only time you should ever look back is to see how far you’ve come.”
58. “No matter how bad things seem, they can always get worse – so be thankful for what you have.”
59. “Life is what you make of it – make it something amazing.”
60. “Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it.”
61. “Life is too short to worry about the stuff that doesn’t matter.”
62. “Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.”
63. “The best thing about life is that it’s unpredictable.”
64. “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.”
65. “Life is a never-ending adventure.”
66. “Every day is a gift, that’s why they call it the present.”
67. “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
68. “The most important thing in life is to enjoy the ride.”
Bob Saget Quotes About Family and Fatherhood
His most important role is as a father and family man. He is best known for his role as the father on the hit sitcom Full House and as the host of America’s Funniest Home Videos.
Bob Saget has always been very open about his family life and the importance of family. In a recent interview, he spoke about how his family has always been his number one priority.
69. “My family is my life. I would do anything for them,” Saget said. “I’m so grateful for my wife and my three beautiful daughters. They’re everything to me.”
Saget also spoke about the challenges of parenting and how he tries to instill values in his daughters.
70. “It’s hard being a parent, but it’s the most rewarding thing in the world,”
71. “I want my girls to be strong, independent women. I want them to know that they can accomplish anything they set their minds to.”
Bob Saget is an inspiration to many families out there. He is proof that no matter what challenges you face in life, you can overcome them if you have a strong support system.
72. “Families should try to have dinner together every night. It’s really important. Studies have shown that families that eat together are happier and healthier. It’s a great way to connect with your kids and spouse and spend some quality time together,”
Saget is also a big believer in the power of communication. He believes that families should openly discuss their problems and concerns. He believes that this open communication will lead to a stronger, more supportive family unit.
73. “Families need to communicate with each other. It’s so important to talk about your problems and concerns. If you keep everything bottled up, it will only lead to more problems down the road. Communication is the key to a happy and healthy family,”
Saget is clearly a big advocate for strong family bonds. His positive attitude and uplifting quotes about family are sure to inspire families all over the world.
His quotes about family are sure to resonate with anyone who has ever faced adversity.
74. “Family is everything. Family comes first. That’s what we have to remember.”
75. “My kids are the best part of my day. They just make me laugh.”
76. “I want to be the best father I can be.”
77. “I think the role of a father is to be there when you need him.”
78. “I think fathers need to be there for their children.”
79. “I think that’s the most important thing – to listen to your kids.”
80. “I think the best advice I can give to anybody is to just be yourself.”
81. “I think the best thing you can do for your kids is to be a good role model.”
82. “Be the best person you can be, and the best father you can be.”
83. “Family is the center of everything. You may not always get along with your family, but they’re the people who are always going to be there for you, no matter what.”
84. “My girls are my everything. They make me laugh, they make me cry, and they make me want to be a better person. I am so grateful to have them in my life.”
85. “No matter what life throws at you, always remember that you have a family who loves you and wants to support you. Lean on them when you need to, and be there for them when they need you.”
86. “There’s nothing like a family dinner to make you appreciate the people in your life. Take the time to sit down and enjoy a meal with your loved ones, and savor the time you have together.”
87. “Family is the most important thing in the world. Make sure you tell your loved ones how much you care about them, and take the time to build strong relationships.”
88. “Having kids is like being punched in the face every day…for the rest of your life.”
89. “The thing about fatherhood is, you can’t really prepare for it. You just have to jump into the deep end and hope you don’t drown.”
90. “My kids are everything to me. I would do anything for them, and I would kill for them.”
100. “Fatherhood is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love my kids more than anything in the world.”
101. “I’m so grateful to be a father. My kids are my life.”
102. “Being a father is the best job in the world…even though it’s not always easy.”
103. “My kids keep me young. They make me laugh every day.”
104. “Fatherhood is the toughest job in the world, but it’s also the best.”
105. “I’m so proud to be a father. My kids are my everything.”
106. “Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there. Thanks for all you do for your kids.”
Bob Saget Funny Quotes
In honor of the great comedian and television star Bob Saget, here are some of Bob Saget’s funniest quotes!
107. “I’m not a robot, I’m a Saget.”
109. “I’m not allowed to say certain words on television, so I guess I’ll just have to say them to you now.”
110. “I’m sorry, I was just trying to be funny.”
111. “I’m the only person in the world that can make a white woman say the N-word.”
112. “I’m not sure if I’m white or black, but I’m sure as hell, not orange.”
113. “I’m not a morning person, but I’m a night owl.”
114. “I’m not necessarily a morning person, but I’m a morning person.”
114. “I’m more of a dog person, but I’m not against cats.”
115. “I’m more of a cat person, but I’m not against dogs.”
116. “I’m more of a human person, but I’m not against animals.”
117. “I’m more of a Saget person, but I’m not against robots.”
118. “I’m friends with John Stamos. And I think that’s as high as I can go.”
119. “I was voted ‘Most Likely to Assassinate the President’ in my high school yearbook.”
120. “I used to play piano in a whorehouse. True story.”
121. “I’m not anti-woman. I’m anti-idiot.”
122. “I love that when you die, your screen saver dies with you.”
123. “My worst date ever was when I was set up with someone who didn’t drink, smoke, or swear. It was like dating a librarian.”
124. “I’m not bitter. I’m not angry. I’m just funny.”
125. “I’m not God. I just play him on TV.”
126. “I’m not necessarily a dumbass, but I don’t mind playing one on TV.”
127. “I’m in a strange place where I’m kind of a loner now.”
128. “I’m the guy who always wanted to be in a fraternity but never was.”
Bob Saget Full House Quotes
129. “I want to apologize to my parents for making them have sex.”
130. “I’m not a ventriloquist, but I’ll throw my voice into your vagina.”
131. “I’m not saying that I don’t like blow jobs, but I prefer someone with a little more enthusiasm.”
132. “I’m trying to think, but nothing happens!”
133. “I busted a mirror and got seven years bad sex.”
134. “I’m not a gynecologist, but I know a cunt when I see one.”
135. “I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a drinker with a writing problem.”
136. “I’m not saying I hate children, but they’re definitely not my favorite people.”
137. “I’m not saying that I don’t like to fuck, but I prefer not to fuck in public.”
138. “I’m not gay, but $20 is $20.”
139. “I’m not going to lie to you, I’ve had a few drinks. But not enough to make me want to fuck you.”
140. “I’m not here to make friends, I’m here to make you laugh.”
141. “I’m not saying that I don’t like to be around children, but I’d much rather be around adults that act like children.”
142. “I’m not saying that I have a small penis, but if I did, it would be okay because I have a large mouth.”
143. “I’m not saying that I’m a sex addict, but I am addicted to sex.”
144. “I’m not saying that I’m a whore, but I’m not afraid to put out.”
145. “I’m not saying that I’m easy, but I’m not that hard to get.”
146. “I’m not saying that I don’t like to be in a relationship, but I’m not looking for anything serious.”
147. “I’m not saying that I’m not looking for a relationship, but I’m not looking for anything that’s going to last longer than a one-night stand.”
148. “I’m not saying that I don’t want to get married, but I’m not in a hurry.”
149. “I’m not saying that I don’t want to have children, but I don’t want to have them right now.”
150. “I’m not saying that I don’t believe in love, but I’m not sure I believe in soulmates.”
151. “I’m not saying that I don’t believe in happily ever after, but I’m not sure I believe in fairytales.”
152. “I’m not a pervert. I just prefer funny porn.”
153. “Our house is clean… but WE ARE HORRIBLE MESSES!”
154. “I’m so manly, I sweat chocolate.”
155. “I’m not p*ssed off at God, I’m just disappointed.”
156. “I’m not a loser, I’m a late bloomer.”
157. “I’m not Jewish, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night.”
158. “I’m not crazy, I’ve just been in a bad mood for 40 years.”
159. “I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.”
160. “I’m an acquired taste – like tequila or a lumpy mattress.”
161. “I’m not necessarily a ship sinker, but I can spot an iceberg from a mile away.”
Bob Saget Inspirational Quotes
162. “Every day is a new opportunity. You can build on yesterday’s success or put its failures behind and start over again. That’s the way life is, with a new game every day, and that’s the way baseball is.”
163. “You have to stay positive and be grateful for what you have. You have to keep looking for the silver lining in every cloud.”
164. “You learn from your mistakes. You get up every morning and you start all over again. It’s like being a batter in baseball. You keep swinging until you hit the ball.”
165. “You have to have a dream so you can get up in the morning.”
166. “If you don’t have a sense of humor, you probably don’t want to be around me very much.”
167. “I think that people who are funny are funny because they’re trying to make other people laugh. I don’t know if that’s necessarily inspirational, but it’s certainly a good way to live your life.”
168. “I’m an eternal optimist. I always look at the positive side of things.”
169. “I try not to sweat the small stuff in life. I mean, it’s all small stuff.”
170. “You can’t keep a positive outlook unless you’re grateful for what you’ve got and looking forward to what’s coming next.”
171. “A lot of people give up. They just don’t understand that making mistakes is how you learn. It’s how you get better.”
172. “I’m not a ‘glass half-empty kind of guy. I’m a ‘glass half-full kind of guy.”
To Wrap Things Up
Bob Saget is a hilarious guy, and these quotes prove it! If you’re ever feeling down, just remember that “life is like a box of chocolates… you never know what you’re gonna get.”
Bob Saget is definitely a guy worth listening to. He has a lot of wisdom to share, and his quotes are always worth reading.
Thanks, Bob, for always making us laugh!
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Hi, I'm a writer and blogger with a degree in psychology. I love sharing my thoughts and experiences through writing and have contributed to various online publications. In my free time, you can find me outdoors, reading, or spending time with loved ones. Thank you for visiting my blog!